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wifostarz
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Posted - 08/29/2011 :  08:36:00 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote Report Abuse

THREE WOMEN

Three women go down to Mexico one night to celebrate college graduation. They got drunk, and woke up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did
the night before.

The first one, a redhead, is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if she has any last words. She says, "I just graduated from Trinity Bible College and believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the
innocent."

They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately fall to the floor on their knees, beg for forgiveness, and release her.

The second one, a brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words.
"I just graduated from the University Of Kentucky School of Law, and I believe in the power of Justice to intervene on the behalf of the innocent."

They throw the switch and again, nothing happens. Again, they all immediately fall to their knees, beg for forgiveness, and release her.

The last one, a blonde (you knew it), is strapped in and says, "Well,
I'm from the University of Tennessee and just graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering, and I'll tell ya right now, ya'll ain't gonna electrocute nobody if you don't plug that thing in."

John Beagle
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Posted - 08/29/2011 :  10:33:47 AM  Show Profile  Visit John Beagle's Homepage  Reply with Quote Report Abuse

Funny!

"I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody" #BillCosby
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Doc
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Posted - 08/29/2011 :  11:01:27 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote Report Abuse

Three men: Priest, Politician, and a Mechanical Engineer at the guillotine...you figure out the rest.
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buck35
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Posted - 08/29/2011 :  11:07:07 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote Report Abuse

In a city park stood two statues, one female and the other male. These two statues faced each other for many years. Early one morning an angel appeared before the statues and said "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have bought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire."
And with that command, the statues came to life. The two statues smiled at each other, ran towards some nearby woods and dove in behind some bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he heard the 2 statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping. After15 minutes the two emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling.
Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have 15 minutes would you like to continue?"
The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?"
Smiling, the female statue said, "Sure, but this time, you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on it's head!"
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